Cigarettes and Coffee

Cigarette. Coffee. Work. Repeat.
With every nicotine filled breath,
I feel my heart increase in its beat.

They're slowly killing me, and I know that.
But how different is it really,
Than these photos of you I keep looking at?

Up I look and see this cherry blossom tree.
However it is its reflection that haunts
These murky waters, as if it is looking at me.

Somehow, it makes me think of you.
It makes me realise that I'm so lost.
That you moved on and left me here ...
... confused, angry and lonely at most.

This fag is finished, but now what?

Something is missing, but I am not sure,

Back to work so early? Definitely not.

I feel drowsy, tired and sleepy ...
I get a coffee from the shop next door,
Where they probably think I'm creepy.

There is little left for me to do.
Focus on work they usually say,
But nothing makes me feel less blue.

And for a change, it is raining again.
With this, gone is the reflection of this tree.
I am left with only one thought in my brain ...
... did I really have to meet you, that day by the sea?

- "Cigarettes and Coffee", Bremen, Germany. April 2018